3.5 Days

Three and a half days until I leave Massachusetts. My mind is kind of a jumbled soup of excitement, anxiety, happiness and sadness. I am beyond ready to be with my love. There is nothing that would change that. However, I am also sad to leave home for good. To be more precise, I am sad to be leaving with the knowledge that I will never live at home again. So much has happened in my house--the house of my youth. I have felt and see so much. But the real thing that I will miss is just having my family around. I would not venture to say I am best friends with my family. But I love them. I really do. My heart wants so many good things for them. It wants to be there.

But now my heart is Frieder's. A step I took a long time ago. We are my priority. So I suppose this whirlwind of emotions is just a natural effect of such tornado-like events traveling gradually across the span of time to culminate in this month of August in 2011: moving out, getting married, moving across the ocean.... No big deal. I know getting married does not fix anything in my life and it certainly does not fix me. However, it is what we want more than anything right now, and I believe it is what God wants too. I know it will be hard work to love, but it is something I desire to do with all my heart.

I know I can handle all of this because although I am weak I have the strength of a God who loves me more than the sparrows; A God who will provide for my every need. I trust him.

For now, I will be packing!