Forgiveness

Lately I have been thinking a whole lot about forgiveness. It has infiltrated so many areas of my life. So many hints appear, seemingly coincidental. In posts for school, books I am reading, the music I hear on the radio, on television. My radar is inexplicably tuned to the need for forgiveness in others. I sent a friend the link to a song I had heard that had really touched me. I told her that she was totally and completely forgiven for not having time for me the past few months; that I had grace for her. She told me later that something broke in her when she heard that song and that she was going to speak with her mother soon and ask for forgiveness. That nailed me to the floor.

The older I have gotten the more I have realized that the people who were supposed to make me feel loved, special, and beautiful as a little girl did a terrible job. When I think back, my heart breaks for that little girl who grew up much too quickly. Sometimes I marvel that today I am very nearly a whole person. Yet, when I remember, I know that it was only my decision to apologize and forgive that released me from the grips of childhood and allowed me to grow and flourish and learn to love more fully. I could not have done it without God's help.

Gary Chapman wrote,

"Many people mess up every new day with what happened yesterday. They insist on bringing into today the failure of yesterday, and in so doing pollute a potentially wonderful day. When bitterness, resentment, and revenge are allowed to live in the human heart, words of affirmation will be impossible to speak" (p. 54).

I fully encourage you to think and pray about the areas in your life where you need to forgive or release someone. Forgiveness is next to impossible without a confession, but release is necessary for many of us to move on. In fact, when you make the first move and apologize--because none of us are without sin--more often than not the other person is fully convicted and will inturn ask for your forgiveness. That's the beauty of forgiveness. It fosters more forgiveness. It opens up channels that were once at an impass. It allows us to love. It is the rock in the pond that upsets the surface status quo and radiates outward until the surface of the entire body of water is changed. For me, it was hard to learn. I am terrified of being vulnerable. However, at one point I just realized that if I did not release myself from the past andif I did not forgive those who had hurt me I would never be able to move on. Forgiveness has been difficult, but it has been the catalyst to growth and love in my life.